i attend a certain university in jersey. an nth year grad student in maths and sciences. i have Adviser Stable in Department Minor and Adviser Brilliant in Department Major. how did i manage this? i was accepted into Dm and sweet-talked my way into AB’s arms. sneaky sneaky.
i’m also a russjoo with a bipolar inferiority / superiority complex, tricksy history, sick sense of humor, an excellent psychologist, and (as of now) an amazing girlfriend: spoons.
u giv me phd, plz?